Thursday, December 10, 2015


Once upon a time...

There was a girl who loved to write.
She welcomed two Little Loves into the world.
All of the sudden, time for writing became super limited.

As the Little Loves grew, so did the need to keep them entertained.
Instead of blogging, the girl spent her time creating.
Making quiet books and file folder games.
Anything to keep her Little Loves quiet at church.
But the goal was not just to be quiet.
Rather Reverent.
So she wanted to make things that taught about Jesus and the gospel.

One time she decided to donate the quiet books for a charity fundraiser.
They sold out quickly.
And many still wanted a copy.

So the girl decided to open an Esty Shop.
To make the reverent creations available to everyone.
Prices are low.
Coupon codes happen frequently. (Like facebook to see the latest codes!)
Simply because the goal is to help other Little Loves.

Please go check it out.
Favorite the store.
Like it on facebook.
Pin your favorites.
Spread the word.

And the girl hopes to return to blogging. It is a hobby. A place to think. A place to be inspired. A place to remember.
No promises though....

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Heidi's History: SEVEN Months

Written on May 1st.

I woke up this morning and realized it was May. Then it hit me that it was May FIRST and Heidi was born on the FIRST. Holy cow... somehow overlooked that. And my baby is officially closer to one that to newborn now. I am with her everyday and yet somehow time goes so fast... so different now that I'm a mother instead of a student/ teacher.

And I was just scrolling through my blog so I could copy this to fill it out again. Apparently, "Heidi's History" is the only thing I write anymore.... Someday I will post more. But that someday is not in this stage of life with two little loves. I'm so busy and constantly trying to keep up with Devin.

Love her feet crossed!
Especially love her smile! :D

Heidi's Favorite Things: She loves being able to roll around and get what she wants. She loves sticking everything in her mouth. She loves smiling. She loves Devin--the two are best friends. (Though she gets nervous if he tries to love her too much/ too tight.) She loves sitting up and being able to see.

Most Memorable Moment(s): April 7--Heidi ate peanut butter for the first time. She also drank from a sippy cup. (That was the only day she drank from it because I gave up. About a month earlier, she would eye my water cup as I drank from it. I decided to share. She can drink from normal cups just fine but can't do a sippy.) April 11--Surprise! Heidi barely has a tooth coming through. No complaints on her part and it was a total surprise. Bottom, Center, Right tooth. April 12--Heidi took the Sacrament for the first time. I whispered in her ear to help her remember Jesus. April 16--first French Fry and first pizza bite. She loves french fries!! And loves pepperoni. She can't chew pepperoni very well but don't take it away from her otherwise it is a total meltdown. Also on April 16--Heidi's second tooth just barely broke through the surface. Again no complaints from her. Bottom, Center, Left.

Nicknames: Missy Moo, Happy Heidi (Devin has a new nickname for her practically everyday. Miss Cheeto. Miss Smiles. Miss Train. Princess.)

Dislikes: Getting in her carseat. Once she is in and buckled, it is fine. But Heidi cries during the actual getting in. She doesn't like to be left because she gets lonely. She wants to always be by me/ in a sling or carrier on me. Heidi doesn't like it when Devin's love becomes too much and she gets smothered. 

Clothing Size: Both 3-6 and 6-9 month. Sunday dresses she pretty much has to wear 12 month with a tie waistband because her legs are so long! At her 6 month check up the start of April, she was like 98% for height and around 30% for weight. Tall and skinny.

Diaper Size: Two. She had a killer diaper rash. And I scheduled an appointment to have it checked. No idea what the problem was but we could not get it to go away--even after following every suggestion from the pediatrician. Thankfully one of our dear friends is a pharmacist. He created a diaper rash concoction. Holy cow. The stuff is magic. Diaper rash is gone. Hallelujah!

Personality: She is the happiest little girl. It is just a delight having her smile in our home. She is very patient and puts up with almost everything. She likes to "talk". And she especially uses her voice to growl. Growling is a happy sound that Devin makes to play with her. So my DAUGHTER thinks growling is a natural happy sound.

Milestones: Heidi is officially mobile! Not in the normal sense of crawling. But she can move across the room to go get a toy she wants. She rolls. And then reaches. It is really cute. She is attempting to figure out what to do with her legs/ knees to crawl but more often than not, it is more like an army crawl where she pushes off with her feet and goes forward a tiny bit if she makes any progress with that. Normally it is just rolling. Heidi LOVES waving at people because it gets a response from them. And she loves the attention. It is the sweetest little wave with the most innocent eyes and biggest smile. Total strangers and friends are smitten by her little wave. She can stand by herself when holding onto something--she can't stand up, but can stay standing if I help her get the thing to hold onto. Her pincer grasp is also definitely improving! She attempts to feed herself but it is still a learning process. Sometimes it is pincer and sometimes it is whole fist grab then she wonders where the food went and how to get it in her mouth.

Sleeping: Heidi sleeps through the night. Thank goodness! Down around 9:30-10 and then awake around 7:30. She takes multiple naps during the day--normally after her tummy is full. But they are like cat naps. She is not a good sleeper during the day. I think Devin/ noise wakes her up. She is not grumpy though and her cat naps tide her over until she can sleep longer.

Eating: She eats three meals a day. She loves food that is in a "pouch" like applesauce, yogurt and baby food. She sucks it right out and can eat it quickly. We give her almost everything we are eating. She gums things very well--as long as it is soft. She still "nurses from a bottle" probably 5-6 times a day.

Communication: Heidi's babbles just barely started changing. I don't know how to describe it but it is like pre-talking noises instead of just random chatter. It is like she is trying to make a "tss" sound. She thinks she is talking when she does that. And I respond so it is almost like carrying on a conversation--I just have no idea what we are talking about. Lol. She definitely recognizes ASL for "milk." I keep teaching her. I think she will start using it soon.

The hardest part: Being a mom is hard. I remember that this is what I always wanted when I was growing up. But my dolls never made food disasters in the high chair. And they never rolled around and almost down the stairs. As the dolls got over, they never dumped out all of their toys and then refused to clean up. They never back talked or yelled at me. Somehow, I don't think I was prepared enough for what this real mom job is like. It is hard.
And... pumping is hard. Devin gets into the most trouble/ biggest messes made while I am pumping. I hate it and Devin abuses it.

My favorite part: The smiles. The hugs. The way her eyes light up when she sees me come for her. The knowing how to calm her down. The cute girl dresses. The being a mommy. The goodnight kiss!

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Heidi's History: SIX Months

Look who can sit up??
I love her hands for balance!

Heidi's Favorite Things: Heidi loves chewing on her fingers... and her toys... and her clothes... num, num, num... everything goes in the mouth. She loves playing with her toys and is so patient to share everything with Devin. Basically, Devin always wants to play with her toys but he if he takes her toy, he will also give her something else (like one of his toys to play with). And Devin is one of Heidi's favorite things. Seriously. The two of them just adore each other. He has a way of making her giggle that no one else can. She loves being held by him and entertained by him. I'm pretty sure these two were the best of friends in heaven before they were born... now they are the best of friends here.

Most Memorable Moment(s): She sits up for long periods of time by herself. She will eventually wobble over. Heidi drank formula for the first time because I completely, completely forgot to pack a bottle for her and she won't nurse. Thankfully she took the bottle without complaint.

Nicknames: Missy Moo, Cutie Patootie, Happy Heidi

Dislikes: Baby food green beans. Oh my--so funny how much she hates pureed green beans. I spoon a bite into her mouth and she gags. And refuses to swallow and just gags some more. However, when I fed her tiny pieces of normal green beans and she gummed them to death with her gummy smile, she didn't seem to mind them. Heidi also does not like being by herself--it is a good thing Devin is her constant buddy.

Clothing Size: 3-6 month

Diaper Size: Two.

Personality: This girl is so incredibly happy. It is so fun to watch her smile in response to me talking to her. She is just such a blessing to have for a daughter-- so very happy. She likes to be included and wants to always help me with whatever I am doing. She is very patient with Devin and loves him dearly. She puts up with a lot with him carrying her around the house, him helping to change her clothes and diaper-- she just grins. It is like she is saying thank you. She likes being held and snuggled. The only time she really cries is when she is super hungry.

Milestones: She passes things back and forth between her hands. Though she definitely favors her right hand. Sometimes it seems like she waves with her right arm. Jabbers in huge, multi-syllable sentences--she really tells the cutest stories. She can feed herself rice crackers with her pincer grasp. (This is still a work in progress which normally requires me to put the cracker in her hand but occasionally she will pick it up herself.)

Sleeping: Because she does not have a bedroom, she is used to waking up when Casey gets ready for work and he puts her binky in then goes back to sleep. Normally she goes to bed around 10ish and then sleeps until 8ish (with the interruption around 5:30ish). Short morning nap because she would rather be awake playing with Devin. Long afternoon nap. Brief cat nap in the evening.

Eating: She likes eating rice crackers at meal time. And baby food. She loves both sweet potatoes and pears. She has tried so many things and seems to like nearly everything. She is able to gum very soft "real" food like bananas. She normally drinks from her bottle probably 4-6 times a day and has three meals at the table with us. Heidi likes to think she is a big girl and can hold the bottle by herself. 

Communication: I'm trying to teach her baby sign. She has not yet used her first sign yet but I actually think she understands. I know she understands what her bottle is because she makes a cooing/ calming noise when she sees it. Heidi babbles regularly and we have long conversations. She has recently decided that to express happiness you have to "roar." (Devin taught her....) She roars regularly. The two of them will roar and giggle back and forth often.

The hardest part: I hate that she is no longer a baby but is not mobile at all. She knows she wants to participate so she squawks for me to come get her. I'm personally struggling with trying to find a balance with scriptures/ exercise/ chores/ reading to kids/ playing with kids/ meals/ laundry/ field trips/ pumping/ etc. I swear there are not enough hours in the day. Sometimes all of the sudden it will be 11am and we are still in pj's and I feel like I have accomplished nothing. And it is hard not being able to help make her cold go away. This cough and runny nose just keep lasting and it is hard that I can't seem to do anything. (And even with the cold and deep cough--she is still full of smiles!)

My favorite part: I just LOVE being a mommy. It is so hard. The hours put in my job are looooong and constant. But I love it. I love dressing her up--especially in dresses and flowers and tutus and shoes-- and "playing" Mommy. I also love that she is just the happiest little love ever. Her smile and light in her eyes radiates for me (and everyone else/ strangers) to enjoy. This truly is "living {my} dream life."

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Heidi's History: FIVE months


Heidi's Favorite Things: She loves "playing" with or rather "laughing at" Devin. He spins in a circle and she laughs. He makes a funny noise and she laughs. They feed off each other and absolutely love being together. (And speaking of that, Devin takes SUCH good care of her! Seriously. He uses his "motherese" and calms and helps her.) Heidi also likes being included, whether we are eating or doing something as a family, she wants to participate. She wants to always be sitting up and/or standing so she can see what is going on.

Most Memorable Moment(s): Heidi started eating food in the beginning of February. It has been a learning experience for both of us. But she is doing so great! 

Nicknames: Missy Moo, Sweet Pea, Love Bug, Happy Heidi

Dislikes: She is not a big fan of just plain cereal anymore--she likes flavor and variety. She doesn't like being by herself while I am in the other room. 

Clothing Size: 3-6 month

Diaper Size: One.

Personality: Happy!! Like all time time. She smiles the cutest gummy grin at anyone who pays attention to her--this always makes complete strangers thrilled while standing in the check out line. She is very patient and willing to try new things. She is calm and cuddly.

Milestones: She can sit by herself for about 10-15 seconds. It gets better each day. Heidi had a major growth spurt recently and can now stand up in her baby walker. She finally does her baby push-ups and likes to be able to see what is going on around her. She puts all her toys, her fingers, my fingers in her mouth--everything has to be "tasted" now. She can roll and has done so before but doesn't do it often, normally she is just content to just stay where she is and Devin will entertain her. She did roll from her back to tummy a handful of times though. She jabbers and grins and giggles. She "talks" now but definitely no where near as much of a chatterbox as Devin was.

Sleeping: Bedtime around 10. Wakes up around 7:30/ 8. Short morning nap. Long afternoon nap. Short evening nap.

Eating: Her absolute favorite thing is pears. Just pears--not mixed with multiple things. She will keep eating and eating them and has absolutely no self-regulation to stop. Heidi normally eats three meals a day and has her bottle like 6-8 times (I'm not sure how often... when she is hungry.) I have not yet found a food that she hates (including peas but I haven't tried green beans yet).

Communication: Heidi responds to me when I talk to her. Like if I ask her if she wants milk, her cry will change from "help me" to a "cooing" thank you/ yum sound. Normally when I say "bonk" she laughs. She doesn't cry often--really only when she is hungry. But she will whine if she lets lonely.

The hardest part: Time. I don't have enough time to spend with her and Devin and keep up with the house and meals.

My favorite part: I love seeing her smile. And kick her feet. I love that I can comfort her in the middle of the night--this is a love/hate really.

Sunday, March 1, 2015

The Humble Beginnings of Photography

I decided that I needed to be able to take better pictures of my children than my SLOW cell phone camera. And seriously, it couldn't be that hard. I'm creative and artistic. And photography is just another outlet. So I bought a refurbished Cannon for less than the cost of one photography session with someone else. I was given a beginning photography book. 

I am a photographer.

I have no idea what I am doing still. It is a work in progress hobby. I'm learning.

And learning means blurry pictures....

And learning is not even sure what these are pictures of...

And learning is realizing that you need a tripod...

And learning is not even sure what happened here... (that is Devin in the middle and the brown thing in the upper right is our wood fence in the backyard)

But learning is great! Goodbye auto-focus camera. 

I'm learning to control the focus.

I'm learning to center on details.

I'm learning to take action shots.

I'm learning to see from different angles.

I'm (still) learning to shoot night scenes.

I'm learning to remember regular life.

I'm learning about flower shots.

And I'm learning about wind and light and exposure and etc. (Sure wish that tree was in blossom... this picture would be that much better...)

Yup. I am a photographer.
And I am learning.

Thursday, February 26, 2015

January 2015

Seeing how February is almost over, I figured it was time to post about January. haha.

I have to say that it was so nice having Casey home on paid holiday on both Jan 1 AND 2. His job is amazing and he was given Friday off as well. It is always so nice to have him home! :) And Jan. 19 was a holiday as well. We spent a lot of the holiday time working to clean the basement. I don't know how you can move from a two bedroom apartment to a two bedroom house with an unfinished basement and suddenly the entire basement is filled with who knows what. I really don't know. But somehow it happened! In order to finish the basement, the junk that we obviously don't need, has to go. D.I. trips and full garbage cans are a regular these days.

We ate at Chick-fil-a FIVE times this month and paid $7.38 total (meaning most of the time we ate their for free!). That my friends was awesome to let Devin play inside their playground, eat yummy chicken and not have it affect our budget!

Heidi was blessed on Fast Sunday.

We went to the Grand Opening for Sprouts. No where near as exciting as the Grand Opening of Smiths was. But it was still fun to go. And speaking of Smiths, our friend Bruce played the trumpet for Devin and gave us icees. And like Chick-fil-a, we frequented Smiths a lot. Free smoothies. Free soda bar. Free coupon class. Free cookie decorating. (My favorite--seriously I am in LOVE with their frosting. Strange because I normally hate frosting. But love the frosting on Smiths sugar cookies. So when I got to decorate it myself, you better believe I made the frosting count!)

Devin has fallen in LOVE with Bruce. Devin frequently tells me that he plays his "trumpet."
He hums random songs while holding his screwdriver to his mouth.

Casey and I won BYU basketball tickets from the car dealership where we bought our car. It was fun being back on campus--even if it was briefly. We enjoyed the game. BYU totally won--my favorite type of game, I don't like suspense! The Marriott Center is known for holding A LOT of people--not having much leg room. So the people sitting directly behind us, like his knee was in my back, but there was nothing to be done about it unless I leaned forward, were SO LOUD. Like, both of our ears were ringing the whole drive home and then some.

I was able to attend Stake Women's Conference! Such a treat. An absolute delight. Carole Mikita was the guest speaker and it was absolutely fascinating listening to her stories of traveling the world with leaders of the Church.

Our car dealership sponsored a free dinner. I'm sure it was a marketing gimmick. But oh. my. yumminess. It was catered from a local Italian place. And the orange creamsicle cake was just to die for. My mouth is watering. We also won a free blanket with their logo embroidered on it. I guess it is meant to be the car blanket! But during the dinner, we learned how much it would cost to redo the locks to make it so they are power instead of only having one manual lock that opens. It was actually cheaper than we thought. So we saved our pennies--and basically used the "bonus" pay check that we got on the 30th and the car is actually at the dealership being upgraded right now. Awesome! So can't wait to drive it by myself with kids--I will actually be able to get them in the car instead of running around/ sitting on the parking lot.

I took advantage of free Hoggle Zoo day on the 28th. It was the first time that Devin has ever been. He liked seeing all the animals. But his favorite part? Walking across the train tracks that went on the sidewalk. Seriously... I wondered why I even bothered taking him to the ZOO instead of just going to ride Trax.

Totally forgot to bring Heidi a hat. I cinched up my Olympic beret and we made it work.
These pictures barely show the animals. Oh well. 

We had the opportunity serve at a funeral in my ward. Because Casey home teaches the family, he wanted to be there to help so took off work and it became our awesome "date" (aka no children event) for the week. I snuck a few brownies and got to hold hands with my sweetheart. The totally inactive family was so appreciative so it was worth it. 

I worked and worked on updating our 72 hour kits. I didn't think it would take nearly the amount of time or money that it did because we already had good 72 hour kits before I started this project. But it is done now. I made one giant bag for all four of us. Because even though it is heavy, I see me being able to manage ONE bag and two children all by myself way better than 4+ bags and two children. Bring on the natural disaster. Knock on wood. I would actually be good if I never had to use our oversized-I-can-barely-pick-up-no-idea-how-to-carry kit.

Devin had so much fun helping with the first aid kit in the 72 hour kit.
Thankfully he found and used the old one that I was replacing because bandaids were no longer sticky.


1. I love Heidi's shirt ("Loveable like Mommy")
2. I love how Devin is holding her hand
3. Devin also wanted to make sure her headband was in the right place
4. I never got the cute/ non-blurry/ posed picture I was after. 

Friday, February 6, 2015

Eating Rice Cereal

Today my baby girl ate for the first time with a spoon. She loved her cereal so much for lunch that she seemed to ask for a bedtime cereal snack. I sat Heidi down in her chair and put the bib on. She immediately opened her mouth wide. She definitely wanted more--glad I am beginning to understand her language. Part of me is so excited watching her learn... try new things... grow.... And that same part is so grateful she did so well with eating her cereal (surprisingly, she did way better with it being thicker like a pudding instead of the super thin consistency the box suggested for first time eaters). 

But part of me cried. My baby is growing up. And for some reason, I'm really struggling with the piled up yesterdays that mean she is not a little baby any more. Maybe that part of me will always struggle as she continues to grow. 

Maybe that part is still longing for my newborn/ hospital experience where you cuddle right after birth and then eat countless Lora Doone cookies while the nurses check both your vitals. Maybe that part still wonders what would have happened if I would have only asked for a different nurse. And wonders if Life Flight and NICU could have been avoided if I would have only been admitted the first time I went to the hospital instead of being sent home. And wonders if she would not have swallowed so much meconium if I had not been bullied into getting an epidural when I should have given birth. 

And maybe that part of me longs to have my baby nurse--even though I was never a fan of it with Devin. Just maybe I'm missing that closeness that neither of us get with a pump. And maybe that same part is longing to have a "first baby" experience where I can focus on just her instead of them together.

Whatever that missing part is, I'm going to hold her close while she sleeps. I'm going to press kisses to her hair. I'm going to laugh when she giggles. I'm going soothe her when she cries. I'm going to cheer when my little Heidi grows and accomplishes new things. And although it will never make up for the loss I experienced at the hospital, it can heal the now.